How To Deal With Grief When You’re Spiritual

By now you may have heard that my beloved Ma — classical singer, conductor, music teacher, and voice coach — suddenly passed two days ago. Adjusting to this new reality has been a journey unlike any other so far.

Thank you all so much for your amazing love, understanding, support, and compassion. I feel inspired to write down my feelings and experiences over the last two days, as there can be misconception, misinterpretation, misunderstanding when it comes to how to deal with the loss of a beloved.

I feel it’s helpful we’re aware of the (very individual) nature of grieving, so everyone is encouraged to be true to their own experience, no matter how much it is not someone else’s. I feel that regarding expression of personal feelings we can benefit from healing this, so we all feel safe to express our feelings. We all crave, deserve, and by our very Nature ARE love, support, tolerance, and acceptance, all of which help us weather life in this earthly plane.

So here is how I see it:

In the “beginning” (meaning every single moment, continually in the NOW) the unmanifest, eternal, reality of Divine manifests into the relative, temporary Lila — or play — of creation.

With it comes the human experience.

(Human) experience is by definition different in different states of consciousness, and knowledge is structured in that consciousness — meaning, for each individual, at ANY given moment in time and space, her/his reality is a different one, just as it is intended in this realm.

As the Divine’s manifestations we each are, we experience life differently, like a snow flake of which there’s only one of each kind.

There are some cosmic Truths that are the same for everyone. As a matter of fact, there is only ONE cosmic Truth for everyone. Our “job” is to find it. Each our own way.

There are as many different paths as there are different Beings.

For me, Maharishi has given me, in this life, the – for me – most perfect guidelines, teachings, techniques, knowledge and experience possible. I am forever grateful for that.

Those are the teachings of the un-manifest absolute.

In this recent life experience of losing a beloved very suddenly, I have identified 7 different realities, all valid, all sometimes coexisting, sometimes separate from one another. Those are:

1) Temporary, sometimes minute-long, overwhelming grief, due to the nature of the sudden shock of realizing that the relationship (a thing in the relative) is suddenly over and will never come back, no matter how much I cry, miss talking to or hugging the beloved person I had just seen 3 days prior. Yes, it is a “selfish” reality, but a human and therefore Divinely-intended, because evolutionary – reality.

2) Great relief that the beloved family member was able to fulfill her life the way she wanted, including her exit. Gratitude for her manifesting life according to her desires. Sometimes this relief is intellectual, to help remind myself that it’s better than the alternatives, but mostly, it’s a feeling level gratitude, coming from deep within.

3) Able to function from a place of more clarity and ease, along with a strange, unfamiliar lightness of my relative being. Maybe because some karma from the interaction with the beloved person was done and can no longer be localized in this plane. This helps when organizing life, flights, plans, family and friends for the memorial service about to take place.

4) Feeling bathed in the actual essence of this person’s soul, all around, thick, light-filled, sweet, almost honey-like, un-localized, without the restrictions of her body, which squeezes our real nature into sometimes unhelpful or uncomfortable habits, behaviors, and karma.

5) The wisdom and compassionate teachings of Maharishi regarding the reality of death (there is none) and birth ( to be grieved more than death, since the person is catapulted out of the experience of Oneness into 3 dimensions not knowing what karma has in store.)

6) The memory of both, my own near-death experiences as a child, where I experienced my true Self, and the memory of spiritual experiences of TC, CC, GC, UC, and BC, if only for minutes, in which it became crystal clear that there is, at worst, nothing to fear, and all is Divinely guided at all times, and at best, there’s indeed only the ONE of us.

7) The powerful, all consuming Reality of Oneness underlying “myself” as the One True Reality, in which I am the many: my beloved other, as well as the one in this incarnation, as well as everyone and everything else. I am all the One, in a multitude of incarnations simultaneously, bathing in, breathing, manifesting Divine Light at all times, being, manifesting, and living a crystal-like holographic, translucent, yet seemingly rock solid, humming, vibrating, Divine reality, made of pure existence.

So that is my path right now, my particular life lesson. It is fast paced, evolutionary, painful, blissful, exhilarating, profound, empowering, humbling, and Divinely guided.

Thank you for being a part of it. I love you.